From Impostor to Expert: How I Learned to Believe in Myself—and You Can Too

Have you ever walked into a room and felt like the only one who didn’t get the memo? Like everyone else was speaking fluent Greek, while you were stuck flipping through the English-to-Greek dictionary from the airport gift shop? Welcome to the glamorous world of impostor syndrome, where self-doubt is the uninvited guest that’s always asking for the Wi-Fi password.

I’ve been there. Coming from a family of Cuban immigrants who worked tirelessly to build a new life in Miami, the bar was set astronomically high. The unspoken rule in my house was that success wasn’t just a goal—it was the rent you paid for every opportunity. It didn’t matter how much salsa I learned to dance or how often family dinners turned into passionate political debates; there was a certain pressure that came with honoring my grandparents' sacrifices.

But no life pressure compares to how impostor syndrome feels when you’re stepping into new roles—whether in your career or relationships. Trust me, I’ve been through it all: stumbling through journalism assignments fresh out of college, publishing my first short story while sweating bullets, and figuring out how to tell someone I liked them without tripping over my own tongue. (Spoiler: evidence suggests I may have failed more than once.)

Yet here’s the kicker: becoming an “expert” is rarely about having all the answers from the get-go. More often than not, it’s about embracing the glorious, cringe-inducing awkwardness of not knowing—and deciding you’re willing to learn anyway.

What Exactly Is Impostor Syndrome?

If impostor syndrome had a cover letter, it would look something like this:

Dear Overachiever,
I’m here to convince you that you’re unqualified, unworthy, and one bad day away from being exposed as a fraud. Hope you like anxiety!
Warm regards, The Voice in Your Head

On closer inspection, impostor syndrome isn’t an actual truth but rather a gap—the mental chasm between where you think you should be and where you currently stand. And the irony? The more capable you are, the harsher that inner critic becomes. Perfectionists feel it. People navigating uncharted territory feel it. Heck, Beyoncé probably felt it the first time she had to learn all the choreography and sing flawlessly (although, to be honest, I can’t confirm this without her publicist).

But let me get personal: as a journalist-turned-writer, I’ve spent years grappling with this feeling. When I was covering stories about immigration and Latinx culture in my early twenties, there were moments I felt wholly inadequate. “Why would anyone care what I have to say?” was the reel playing in my mind on a loop. Thoughts like these can leave you frozen, unsure whether to step up or step out.

How I Started to Silence That Inner Critic

Spoiler alert: you don’t kill the inner critic—you outsmart it. Instead of trying to silence the voice in my head, I started treating it like an overprotective abuelita who was just a little too extra about her opinions. Respectful acknowledgment, followed by: “Thanks for the concern, but I’ve got this.”

Here’s what helped me (and might help you):

1. Reframe “Expertise” as Growth, Not Perfection

The truth is, no one becomes an expert overnight. Even Michelangelo had to learn how to hold a chisel before he sculpted David. Expertise happens when you show up consistently for the messy middle and allow space for mistakes. Early in my writing career, I learned to redefine success—not as having every answer, but as being the guy who was willing to ask the right questions and follow them where they led.

What this looks like IRL:
- Can’t nail a presentation at work? Be proud that you raised your hand for the opportunity in the first place.
- New to romantic relationships? You don’t have to ace the “getting-to-know-each-other” phase. What matters is that you’re showing up with curiosity and effort.

2. Stop Comparing Your “Behind-the-Scenes” to Everyone Else’s Highlight Reel

This one smacked me hard when I was living in Chicago during my writing fellowship. There I was, surrounded by people quoting obscure poetry at parties and submitting 10,000-word novellas while I was just trying to navigate a brutal Midwestern winter in sneakers I bought at a Miami mall. I’d scroll through their beautifully curated lives on Instagram, thinking: “How do they have it all figured out?”

Newsflash: they didn’t. None of us do, and that’s perfectly fine. Social media makes it easy to believe everyone else is thriving while you’re floundering in real-time, but let me be clear—highlight reels aren’t reality. If you’re busy growing into your role, keep your focus there. Instagram won’t validate the person you’re becoming, but you will.

3. Celebrate Every Win—Big or Small

I used to dismiss my own wins under the guise of humility. “That story I wrote? Not that great. That connection I made? Probably luck.” Sound familiar? Quit that mindset. I learned to treat all progress as valid by jotting down small victories in a journal. Seeing them on paper makes them tangible—and proof that you’re not standing still.

Examples to celebrate: - You nailed a difficult conversation with your partner? That’s progress.
- Published a post you were second-guessing? That’s courage.
- Figured out mid-date what someone meant by “cottagecore”? That’s survival.

4. Surround Yourself with the Right People

Here’s a fun fact: impostor syndrome loves isolation. It feeds on silence and thrives when we assume we’re the only ones who don’t have it figured out. The cure? Surrounding yourself with people who remind you (often) that your contributions matter.

For me, this started at home. My parents and grandparents carried their own self-doubt when they arrived in a foreign country with limited resources. Even so, they built a foundation of grit and possibility that helped me see mistakes as stepping stones. Now, whether it’s my partner, creative mentors, or friends who hype me up over cubanos and croquetas, I lean on a community that keeps me grounded. Find your hype squad—they’re invaluable.

Embrace the You of Today—Not Some Future, “Perfect” You

Let’s be real: impostor syndrome doesn’t disappear after one TED Talk or pep rally in the mirror. It ebbs and flows, showing up particularly when you’re leveling up. And that’s the good news—because when impostor syndrome rears its ugly head, it means you’re in the arena, risking vulnerability, and building something.

Ultimately, transformation isn’t about leaping fully-formed into expertise; it’s about walking hand-in-hand with uncertainty until you no longer fear it. Today, I write novels about intergenerational love—not to tie a bow on my identity, but to keep exploring its loose threads. Every word I write feels more truthful than the last—not because I have it all “figured out” but because I trust my voice more deeply now.

Here’s what I know for certain: You don’t have to wait to become someone else to show up for your life. Your doubts? They’re just the background noise to a story that’s uniquely yours to tell. So take a deep breath, step forward, and claim your space. After all, the world is waiting on you—not some illusion of perfection—but the real, messy, ever-learning you.