There are few things in this world I claim to be an expert on: identifying the exact moment a campfire s’more reaches peak gooeyness, navigating a conversation with someone who insists Bigfoot is real (it’s all about the nod), and packing light for any situation. But when it comes to the things I can’t live without, my essentials are less about surviving in the wild and more about thriving in everyday life—whether it’s mountainside or fireside, date night or lazy Sunday. These aren’t just objects; they’re pieces of my life that keep me grounded and, occasionally, impressively sane.

1. A Good Flannel (or Three)

Some people have a signature cologne; I have a signature fabric. There’s just something about a flannel that says, “I put in effort,” while also whispering, “...but not too much.” Flannel is my utility player: soft enough for a lazy afternoon hike but versatile enough to pair with jeans on a casual date. Plus, it’s arguably the most non-threatening fabric in existence—like the golden retriever of clothing.

My go-to ones are broken-in beauties, frayed at the cuffs but still warm against Tahoe's crisp fall mornings. On more than one occasion, they've doubled as a makeshift blanket for rooftop star-gazing or wrapped around someone’s shoulders when the night air turned colder than expected (points for chivalry!). Bonus? They age better than I do, which feels like an unfair competition.

Pro tip: Always have a backup. If you’ve lived through the dreaded moment of spilling coffee—or worse, chili—on your go-to date flannel, you know this isn't negotiable.

2. My Weatherproof Notebook

You could argue notes mostly live in our phones these days, but my weatherproof notebook is small enough to slip into a coat pocket and tough enough to withstand a snowstorm. Big ideas (or, let’s be honest, date banter brainstorming) don’t always respect the boundaries of Wi-Fi access or dry conditions.

This little book is more than a tool—it’s a memory bank. Inside its battered pages are half-baked essay ideas, sketches that resemble campfires but were meant to be birds, and a collection of infamous one-liners from lodge guests over the years.

It’s also seen its fair share of first-date questions scribbled in the margins: “What’s your dream wild animal encounter—and why?” (highly recommend stealing that one). Even if the date flounders, at least I always walk away with something for the book.

3. A Cast-Iron Skillet

Okay, hear me out because I know this isn’t a typical “modern romance” item, but this is about survival of both the stomach and the soul. The skillet and I go way back. It’s seasoned, both literally with decades of use and figuratively with the memories that happened while using it. I’ve made everything from trout tacos (a big hit on lakeside dates) to post-breakup grilled cheese with extra butter because my mom told me some tragedies require more calories.

The great thing about cast iron is its reliability. It doesn’t ask you for anything fancy; it just works. We could honestly all aspire to be a little more like it in relationships—steady, durable, and not afraid to soak up flavor from whatever life throws at us.

4. My Trusty Backpack

When you grow up a stone’s throw from glorious mountains, ‘everyday carry’ isn’t just an internet trend—it’s a non-negotiable lifestyle. Mine has been with me through heartbreak hikes and date-night adventures where I tried not to look too smug while packing perfectly portioned trail snacks (the key to anyone’s heart is through their stomach, trust me).

Here’s where the magic happens: the front pocket doesn’t just hold snacks and maps; it also hides my secret weapon—a deck of cards. Nothing sidesteps the awkwardness of first-date silences better than a round of speed or some playful trash-talking over blackjack. And if card games don’t land, you can always whip out a painted rock you “just happened to find” as an icebreaker. (Hyper-specific move? Yes. Does it work? Also yes. Painted rocks for the win.)

5. A Vinyl Copy of Fleetwood Mac’s Rumours

In case the flannel didn’t give it away, I have a thing for nostalgia, and nothing anchors me to a moment like music. Fleetwood Mac’s Rumours is the heartbreak-and-healing album I never knew I’d need. Whether it’s Stevie Nicks crooning me through a breakup or providing cozy background vibes for cooking dinner with someone special, this record feels like a trusted friend who’s seen it all—and doesn’t judge.

It’s also an accidental litmus test for compatibility. If someone says they don’t at least tap their foot to “Dreams,” I know we won’t be building playlists for a joint road trip anytime soon. Harsh? Maybe. True? Absolutely.

6. Homemade Trail Mix

Stay with me—this isn't just about food; it’s about philosophy. I genuinely believe you can tell a lot about someone by how they make their trail mix. My personal recipe says: I’m practical (a hearty base of almonds and walnuts), spontaneous (M&M’s because why not), and relatable (hello, pretzels).

Trail mix is also a great reminder that we’re all allowed to combine different “ingredients” in life, love, and snacks. Sweet and salty? That’s basically the cornerstone of chemistry.

And okay, I have to say it: sharing a bag of trail mix on a hike with someone you’re into? Peak romance. The “accidentally” brushing hands when both reaching for the last chocolate chip? A move straight out of the rom-com playbook.

7. The Mountains (Always)

This one’s a little abstract, but no list of my essentials would be complete without them. The Sierra Nevada mountains and the lakes embedded within their folds are my compass, my therapist, and occasionally my third wheel.

The mountains have witnessed every chapter of my awkward attempts at relationships: the campfire guitar singalongs where sparks flew (literal and figurative), the hikes where silences felt intimate rather than forced, and the rainy days that demanded vulnerable conversations because, really, what else are you going to do when your tent leaks?

But it’s not just about romance. It’s about perspective. These mountains are a constant reminder that, no matter how tangled things get in the world of dating, there’s always something bigger and steadier out there to lean on.

Some might say this is an eclectic list, but that’s the beauty of it. Just like relationships, the things we can’t live without are deeply personal and often delightfully unexpected. So, whether I’m savoring a quiet evening wrapped in my trusty flannel or debating my Fleetwood Mac allegiances with someone new, these essentials are my anchors. They remind me where I come from, what I value, and why being a little weird and specific about what keeps you grounded is worth celebrating.

Take it from me—a guy with flannel shirts and trail mix permanently in his rotation—whether you’re out finding new connections or fortifying ones you’ve already got, lean into the things you love and let them guide you. As the mountains taught me, life’s too short to settle for anything less than a well-seasoned skillet and the perfect Fleetwood Mac riff.