Roll the Credits: A Movie About My Life (With a Side of Dating Drama)

Ever sit back, stare at your ceiling, and think, If my life were a movie, who the heck would play everyone? No? Just me? Well, buckle up because I’ve got the popcorn ready, and I’m about to spill the cinematic tea on how my life would translate to the big screen. Spoiler alert: it’s a rom-com-dramedy with a dash of awkward encounters and accidental wisdom.

Act I: The Lead Role (Played by... Me)

Casting myself was harder than I thought. Do I go aspirational and choose someone like Zoe Kravitz (level-headed and quietly cool)? Or really lean into the chaos and energy of my 20s and cast Aubrey Plaza (sarcastic with a secret soft side)? Ultimately, I realized that neither of these actresses knows what it’s like trying to balance two worlds, growing up torn between cultural traditions and the magnetic pull of modern independence. Enter: Tanaya Beatty.

She’s an indigenous actress who brings depth and empathy to her roles. Plus, her ability to quietly command a scene feels so reminiscent of the nights I’ve spent at family gatherings, quietly soaking up my parents’ whispered stories in Diné, while simultaneously texting my friends about weekend plans. Whether I’m navigating family expectations (Are you seeing a nice boy?) or advocating for myself in love, she could channel that subtle tension between roots and wings.

The movie’s tagline? Awkwardly Romantic: A Tale of Sweatpants, Cross-Cultural Identity, and Calling Your Grandma Too Late at Night.

Act II: The Supporting Cast (Or, Why My Love Life Needs a Script Doctor)

What’s a good movie without a kooky supporting cast? If my life’s movie were honest, the supporting characters would be equal parts BFFs, romantic interests who are just not ready for the main stage, and family members with very strong opinions on everyone’s life except their own.

The BFF: Played by Awkwafina

Loyal, hilarious, and the only person I can text with typos and still be understood. Awkwafina brings that chaotic energy of sending you loud voice notes that your AirPods can’t soften fast enough. She’s the person telling me at brunch that no, I absolutely cannot ghost someone just because they like raisins in cookies and yes, I do have to text them back if I promised to meet up.

The One Who Got Away: Played by Dev Patel

Ah yes, the poetic, too-good-to-be-true love interest. He’s got an easy smile, unreadable texts (seriously, what does “haha sounds good” even mean?!), and an unmatched talent for making deep eye contact. Was he emotionally available when life threw us together? No. But did that stop me from writing a detailed pros-and-cons list on why we could have been the OTP? Also no. Dev Patel, call me—I mean, call this a perfect casting.

Act III: The Plot Twists (aka My Love Life as a Highlight Reel)

If my dating history were adapted to film, the plot would be one part slow burn, one part slapstick comedy, and a sprinkle of heartfelt montages.

  • That One Awkward First Date: Picture it. I’m sitting across from someone who looks slightly cuter than their profile photo. There’s extensive small talk, some nervous laughing, and then—disaster strikes. We both reach for the hot sauce at the same time, and his elbow sends my water glass careening into my lap. Cue a slow-motion shot of me standing up, drenched pants clinging to everything. Would I like my audience to cringe? Yes. Because if I lived it, YOU should feel it too.

  • The Proposal That (Almost) Was: Okay, so maybe there weren’t actual wedding bells, but there was that summer fling abroad that had me wondering if I was living in a Hallmark movie—until I realized they were juggling me and another “fling” like some kind of emotional circus act. Cut to a dramatic airport goodbye scene where, instead of running to stop them from boarding their flight, I went straight for the duty-free snacks. Self-love, people.

Act IV: Musical Montage (with Some Dating Wisdom Thrown In)

No rom-com would be complete without a killer soundtrack and a tear-inspiring montage where the protagonist learns a Very Important Lesson™. Picture me sitting in my sunlit apartment amid plants I pretend to water (they deserve better), finally realizing: The hero of any good love story has to fall for themselves first.

This montage would feature snippets of me:
- Ghosting bad habits (pun intended—bye, situationships)!
- Learning the art of saying no to things I don’t want just to keep someone from feeling weird.
- Secretly practicing Beyonce-level dance moves in front of a mirror because why claim growth if it doesn’t come with fierce energy?

What I’ve learned—and what our hypothetical movie audience would learn too—is that relationships aren’t the entire plot. Sometimes, it’s the subplots that steal the show. The career breakthroughs, the family dinners, the solo trips that stretch your comfort zones. All those moments make you a better and more grounded supporting actor in someone else's life when that Big Love finally comes along.

Act V: My Future Star Co-Lead?

So, who plays the love of my life? Let’s be real—casting this role feels nearly impossible. For one, they would have to bring that rare mix of goofy charm and emotional vulnerability (think Nick Miller from New Girl meets Daniel Henney in anything). And more importantly, they’d need to match my energy: grounded but curious, compassionate but with a secret competitive streak in board games.

But for now, let’s leave that casting call open. This movie isn’t over yet, after all—and the best romances tend to start with an unexpected twist. Until then, I’ll be benching Dev Patel and placing my bets on Tanaya Beatty’s ability to carry a sequel.

Curtain Call: Life as Both the Star and Director

At its heart, telling your story—whether in a film, on paper, or to your friends after one too many margaritas—is a way to own who you are. And honestly? If my life were a movie, I know critics would rave about the laughter, the relatable cringe moments, and the touching performances from the people I’ve been lucky enough to call my crew.

So here’s my final note: We’re all the stars of our own chaotic, meaningful lives. Whether your movie’s a rom-com, a drama, or, let’s face it, an intricate streaming series with unnecessary filler episodes—embrace it. Show up for your role, cast good people, and remember to have fun in the bloopers. After all, there’s no better love story than the one you’re writing right now.

Cue credits—and some Lizzo playing in the background.