How Travel Showed Me Who I Really Am

Ever had someone tell you that traveling will “change your life” or “make you a better person”? I used to roll my eyes at these Pinterest-worthy proclamations. Sure, Paris might be chic and Bali might be spiritual, but how much can a suitcase and a boarding pass really teach you that life back home can’t? Spoiler alert: a lot—but not in the shiny, Instagram-filtered way you might expect.

Travel doesn’t gift-wrap life lessons for you. It’s more like that brutally honest friend who tells you your shirt tag is sticking out when you’re mid-presentation. It’s messy, humbling, and occasionally makes you cry in public bathrooms—but you emerge better for it. Somewhere between missing my bus in Stockholm and navigating Melbourne’s trams, I started figuring out who I really am. And surprisingly, those moments of discomfort taught me some home truths I didn’t know I was ready for.

1. I’m Not as Chill as I Thought—and That’s OK

Growing up on Vancouver’s laid-back West Coast, I always assumed I had a relaxed, go-with-the-flow vibe. (We literally use words like “dude” and consider yoga a personality trait.) But then I found myself in Barcelona, nervously clutching a map while a Spanish grandmother rapid-fired directions in her kind but incomprehensible Catalan. My inner control freak started to show. I realized I had this deep-rooted need to always know what’s coming next—a direct contradiction to my surfer-girl fantasies.

And guess what? That’s actually fine. Not everyone is born to wing it on a whim like Anthony Bourdain. When I travel, I’ve learned that having a rough plan (plus a backup one) keeps my overthinking brain at bay and helps me actually enjoy where I am.

Practical takeaway:
If you lean toward Type A tendencies like me, let yourself schedule a little structure even in your adventures. Map out one or two attractions you want to see each day; the rest can be wild-card moments. Balance looks different for everyone.

2. Your Comfort Zone Is Basically a Pacifier

It hit me after my first meat pie disaster in Melbourne. You can’t eat one while walking—trust me, I tried. Sitting at a park bench far from the bakeries I loved back in Vancouver, I felt so out of place that I wasn’t even enjoying my flaky pastry. Why couldn’t Australian meat pies be wrapped in the comforting familiarity of a Tim Horton’s double-double vibe?

Travel made me realize how much I cling to familiar routines for security. While there’s nothing wrong with preferring certain habits or foods, stepping out of your comfort zone—whether it’s tackling foreign public transit or trying Malaysia’s durian (a fruit that smells suspiciously like socks)—forces you to see yourself in a new light.

There’s power in fumbling through. It strips away the neat little labels you stick on yourself: I’m an ocean girl. I’m bad with spicy food. I’ll always choose tea over coffee. But sometimes, being somewhere new challenges who you thought you were—and that’s where growth happens.

Practical takeaway:
Try at least one thing while traveling that makes you hesitate. Order something off a menu you can’t pronounce. Take a cooking class. Hike that trail you weren’t sure about (but maybe bring bug spray). Getting a little uncomfortable is where the real magic lives.

3. You Can’t Pack Away Your Emotional Baggage

Apparently, I thought my anxieties had to stay in Vancouver when I flew to Tokyo. But they came along, fully checked and wheeled behind me. Travel doesn’t erase what’s already simmering in your head; sometimes it magnifies it. I spent one solo day in Kyoto spiraling over a cringy thing I said to an ex five years ago. (Why now, brain? Why??)

Travel might not heal your emotional mess, but it does give you perspective—a kind you just don’t get staring at the same living room walls day after day. Sitting under a towering bamboo grove, I realized how small my problems were compared to the sheer expanse of the world. That ex from five years ago? They probably didn’t even remember that moment. And if they did? It just didn’t matter anymore.

Practical takeaway:
If you’re traveling to escape a tough breakup, work stress, or life in general, use the opportunity to reflect instead of suppress. Journal during downtime or find a quiet corner in a park, café, or temple to check in with yourself. Bonus: when those invasive thoughts creep in, you’ll at least have a better view than your couch.

4. People Are Your Greatest Mirrors

I once bonded with a hostel roommate in Melbourne over a shared love of The Killers during karaoke night. We completely butchered “Mr. Brightside,” but the experience taught me something I didn’t expect: the way people respond to you can reveal parts of yourself you don’t even notice.

That night, she told me I have “the warmest, most open energy.” Me? The slightly sarcastic, overthinking poet from coastal Canada? It reminded me how often we filter our self-image through what we perceive as “weaknesses” instead of strengths. From casual conversations with cab drivers to deep talks with strangers at gelato stands, travel helped me see the best versions of myself that I sometimes ignore back home.

Practical takeaway:
Don’t be afraid to talk to locals or travelers. Whether it’s asking for directions or swapping stories over a shared drink, every interaction can teach you something unexpected about yourself. Your perspective—and theirs—can deepen in delightful ways.

5. Home Is a Feeling, Not a Place

From the cozy cafes in Copenhagen to stepping barefoot on Tofino’s sandy shores, I’ve felt “at home” in places that look nothing like Vancouver. But then there are moments when I live in Vancouver itself for weeks and feel restless, like I’m missing something I can’t quite name.

Travel has taught me that home isn’t tied to your zip code or whether you own matching throw pillows. It’s the small rituals: the people you laugh with, the smells of coffee in the morning, the buzzing hum of a city that feels alive. I carried “home” with me in the form of my journal, late-night texts to friends, and my favorite travel playlist. You learn to create it wherever you go.

Practical takeaway:
If you’re wandering but feeling adrift, build a portable sense of home. Pack a tiny object you love—candles, books, it doesn’t matter. For me, it’s a Polaroid of my parents next to our Kitsilano café. You might find yourself grounded in unexpected places when you let go of what “home” looks like.

Conclusion: Finding the Real You Is Worth the Layovers

Travel isn’t just about passport stamps or flawless beach selfies (though those are nice too). It’s a series of trial-and-error moments that front-load your personal growth in ways you can’t get from another self-help book or podcast. The trick isn’t to leave your “old self” behind, but to discover new sides of who you already are.

So here’s my pitch: pack your bags—and your emotional baggage—and go face the unexpected. You might not come back with all the answers, but you’ll return with stories worth telling and a version of yourself worth meeting. Isn’t that worth the TSA line?