Have you ever watched a movie and thought, “My life could totally be a film?” Not in the blockbuster, superhero sense (although if Marvel’s hiring, I won’t say no), but in the romantic-comedy-meets-telenovela kind of way. As someone who grew up in a house where every meal felt like a family reunion and life had the energy of a Celia Cruz song, it’s hard not to imagine my life as a movie. After all, what’s life if not a series of dramatic monologues, comedic side plots, and the occasional plot twist that leaves you saying, “¡Ay Dios mío!”

So, if some Hollywood director called me tomorrow and said, “Isabela, tell us everything. Who’s in this movie about you?” I’d have to grab some cafecito and lay it all out. Here’s exactly how I’d cast the unforgettable movie of my life, relationships, and all the hilarious chaos in between.

The Leading Lady: Me, of Course

It’s only right to start with my character. She’s fiery yet introspective, a mix of old-world family tradition and modern independence. Who could possibly embody all those nuances? Ana de Armas. I mean, she’s Cuban. I’m Cuban. She’s gorgeous. I also clean up pretty well when I’m not in my sweatpants (humble brag).

Ana would bring the right amount of charm to narrate my inner monologue and deliver those quiet emotional moments—you know, the ones where I sit at a Miami café, sipping a cortadito while wondering, Should I have texted him back? Is this a metaphor for life? Ana’s performance would nail the balance between heartfelt vulnerability and knowing how to throw sass like it’s a rite of passage. Spoiler: in Little Havana, it is.

The Love Interests: The Playlist of Past and Present Flings

Ask any good storyteller, and they’ll tell you: no movie works without a compelling romantic subplot or three. My love life has been less “Twilight love triangle” and more “choose-your-own-adventure.”

  1. The High School Sweetheart (Played by Michael Peña): Let’s call him Danny—for privacy’s sake, but also because that’s literally his name. Picture a sweet boy-next-door type, someone who wore socks with sandals long before it was ironic. Michael Peña could bring the comedic tenderness this character deserves. Also, he’d nail the part where “Danny” gave me a mixtape after our first argument. What was on it, you ask? Enrique Iglesias’ “Hero.” I’m still recovering.

  2. The Creative Type (Played by Oscar Isaac): Oh, then there was “adventurous José,” a photographer with a man-bun and a way of making every interaction feel like a deep conversation about art. Cue Oscar Isaac capturing that slow grin and dreamy energy. José was the guy who’d talk endlessly about his Europe backpacking trip but refuse to answer why he still didn’t have a stable job. We didn’t last long, obviously, but boy, did that first date make me think I’d found my soulmate. Spoiler: I didn’t.

  3. The Unexpected Match (Played by Pedro Pascal): The most recent addition to my cast is someone best described as “that guy you didn’t see coming.” Enter Pedro Pascal to embody the charm of someone hilarious, kind, and totally unlike my usual “type.” Let’s face it—half the fun of modern dating is realizing your type is not working and pivoting hard. Pedro as “Lucas” is the guy who calls out my sarcastic humor and laughs when I mispronounce Spotify as “Spotty-fee” (again, it’s my parents’ influence).

The Overbearing (but Lovable) Parents: The Heart of the Story

Parents deserve their moment in anyone’s life film. Mine, who immigrated from Cuba, never fail to deliver heartfelt advice, followed almost immediately by mildly passive-aggressive remarks about why I haven’t settled down yet. (Mija, the underlying subtext is: ¿Y los nietos?)

Naturally, I’m casting Rita Moreno for my mom. Who else? She’d bring the perfect blend of wisdom, sass, and unmatched Latin mom energy. She’d ask Ana de Armas (me) things like, “Did you cook him dinner? Men love a woman who can cook,” right before fixing my hair and asking if my lipstick is bold enough.

My dad? He’s a soft-spoken but deeply loyal protector who swears by the domino table and knocks out everyone during family game night. The legendary Andy García would own this role. Picture him quietly studying Ana de Armas’ love interest, disguised as “casual parenting” but really performing a whole FBI-level background check.

The Comic Relief: The Friends Who Keep It Real

What’s a life movie without a solid best friend squad chiming in? These characters have their own energy—like that one friend who always tells it how it is with zero sugarcoating.

  1. Zoë Kravitz as Camila: My artsy, free-spirited best friend who can't help but say, “Girl, WHY do you let red flags look like carnival decorations?” It’s the tough love we all need sometimes.
  2. John Leguizamo as Ruben: The life of the party and also the official “listener” of our group chats. He’s the one to text me at 1 a.m.: You up? Wanna unpack why your ex snapped at your Instagram Story?
  3. Awkwafina as Jen: Okay, so Jen isn’t Cuban, but we’ll allow a little artistic license. Jen would inject every scene with spit-out-your-drink humor, particularly during threatening-to-text-your-ex moments. She’s the human equivalent of “DELETE THAT, NOW.”

The Setting: Miami, Baby!

No movie about me would be complete without Miami as a character all its own. Cue neon pastel shots of Calle Ocho, wild karaoke nights fueled by mojitos, the chaos of overprotective tias interrogating me during Thanksgiving, and the hum of salsa in the background of my daily routine. From the sun-drenched Magic City skyline to the sound of dominoes clinking in Máximo Gómez Park, Miami isn’t just a setting—it’s the heartbeat of the story.

Fun fact: My parents once joked that dating in Miami is like shopping at a bodega labeled “Good Luck.” Everyone’s pretty, no one’s looking for anything serious, and if you come back disappointed…well, at least you’ll leave with a cafecito. But hey, no rom-com is complete without a little turbulence, right?

The Climax: Screw Perfect Outcomes

In most movies, the heroine’s triumph means securing a “happily ever after”—the perfect man, house, or resolution. But let me tell you something I’ve learned over time: real life isn’t about tying dreams up with a neat bow. It’s about messy, perfectly imperfect self-discovery. If I’ve learned anything from navigating the rollercoaster of modern dating as a Cuban woman with one foot in tradition and one in the 21st century, it’s this: The story’s ending doesn’t have to be romantic, just authentic.

Maybe in the final movie scene, Ana de Armas leans against a Miami balcony, phone in hand, typing, Hey, I had a great time. Want to grab coffee soon? Maybe Pedro Pascal reads the text, smiles, and replies. Or maybe he doesn’t—and that’s okay too.

You don’t need a perfect conclusion when your journey is a masterpiece. And that, my friends, is the movie of my life. Grab your popcorn—or better yet, a pastelito—and enjoy the show.