From Seaweed to Self-Worth: Battling Impostor Syndrome and Owning Your Expertise

We’re all a little guilty of it: standing in front of a mirror, squinting suspiciously, and waiting for the real expert—the polished, flawless, capital-“A” Adult—to show up. But what if I told you that the secret to getting there is realizing… no one else is coming?

If you've ever felt like a fraud in your job, your relationships, or even just in life, you're in good company. Impostor syndrome has a sneaky way of creeping in and planting itself, uninvited, like sand stuck in your flip-flops. For me, it showed up the day I signed my first book deal—a moment that should’ve felt triumphant but instead made me want to duck under the nearest tidepool rock and hide. I kept waiting for someone—maybe a grumpy editor in a turtleneck—to yank my contract away and say, "Actually, we made a mistake." They didn't, of course, but that creeping doubt? It clung for longer than any wet wetsuit.

Whether you're paddling through new currents at work, in love, or in life, learning to trust yourself isn’t always easy. But just like navigating tricky ocean swells, it’s a skill you can master. Here’s how I went from wobbly newbie to semi-confident pro (emphasis on the “semi,” because I’m human, after all)—and how you can, too.

1. Recognize the Lie in "Luck"

When I got my first full-time writing job, I credited it to good timing and a flaky avocado toast-eating candidate who’d turned the position down. It couldn't have been my talent, I told myself. Nope, just dumb luck. But let's zoom out for a second. Did I work hard on my writing samples? Yes. Had I honed my storytelling skills for years before landing that role? Absolutely. Was flaky avocado-toast girl helpful to my career trajectory? Sure, but she wasn’t the only reason I got my shot.

Impostor syndrome often twists your accomplishments into cosmic coincidences. But luck is just opportunity meeting preparation. If you’ve put in the work, accept that you didn’t accidentally fool anyone into giving you the keys to the castle. You earned it.

2. Fake It Till You Become It

I know, I know—"Fake it till you make it" sounds about as deep as a puddle after light drizzle. But here's the twist: When you're stepping into a new role, pretending you belong there isn’t about phoniness; it’s about growing into the space you’ve carved for yourself. For me, this idea crystallized one summer morning while I was surfing at Windansea Beach. (Translation for the non-surfers out there: I was being repeatedly body-slammed by waves while actual surfers artfully carved the ocean like it was butter.)

After face-planting for the fifth time, I decided to stop apologizing to everyone for existing in their water. Instead, I paddled back out again—less with the awkwardness of a seal pup losing its balance and more with the energy of, "I belong here, dang it!" And you know what? Eventually, I started catching waves. Little ones at first, but with time, they got bigger. What was once "fake it" morphed, imperceptibly, into "own it." Just like surfing, any skill or role becomes easier the more you show up for the practice—and practice matters more than perfection.

3. Say Goodbye to the Highlight Reel

Let’s be real: most of us are comparing our behind-the-scenes bloopers to someone else’s highlight reel. It's the nature of social media (and office Zoom meetings, for that matter). Nobody Instagrams themselves mid-failed presentation or posts a selfie with the caption, "Just got rejected—AGAIN!" Instead, we get Beyoncé-level curation.

But comparison is an unwinnable game. For example, I once wrote an article while knee-deep in imposter syndrome, assuming my writer friends were typing away like Pulitzer-ready geniuses. Turns out, one of them had spent three hours deleting and rewriting the same sentence ("We still hate it, but it's marginally less terrible now," they joked), and another had an unpublished draft about baby platypuses gathering dust because they were convinced no one cared. What did I learn? Most of us are just gritting our teeth and winging it, no matter how shiny things look from the outside.

4. Build a "Beach Crew"

Do you know who never doubted me, even when I was doubting myself? My parents. (Thanks, Mom and Dad!) My college professor, the one who used to write "More risk! Less perfectionism!" all over my papers in bold red ink. My best friend, who sends me memes with captions like "You are trying your best under late-stage capitalism, and that’s MORE than enough."

It’s not always easy to quiet that inner voice whispering, "You’re a phony." That’s why you need people in your life who’ll drown it out with their trust and encouragement. They won’t necessarily eliminate your self-doubt (only you can do that), but they can act as the metaphorical life jackets when you’re treading uncertain waters. Find your beach crew—the ride-or-die friends, mentors, or partners who remind you that you’re already the right person for the job (or the relationship or whatever big, messy thing you’re scared of).

5. Permission to Be Human

Perfectionism, you sneaky little devil. You make us think that unless we're flawless, we’re totally unqualified. But here's a truth bomb: Expertise doesn’t mean being error-free—it means being willing to make mistakes, learn from them, and keep going.

Remember that book deal I mentioned? I spent weeks obsessing over every paragraph, thinking that anything less than literary genius would expose me as a fraud. Spoiler alert: It didn’t. In fact, the feedback I got was warm, kind, and constructive. Nobody said, "How dare you misspell that one word on page 37?" And even if they had, guess what? I could’ve fixed it in a reprint. Growth is inherently messy, and you’ve gotta give yourself the same kindness and patience you’d offer a friend—even when you flop.

6. Turn Self-Doubt into Curiosity

Here’s the thing about impostor syndrome: it’s surprisingly inventive. Whatever milestone you hit, it’s waiting to prod you with new insecurities. “Okay, maybe you pulled THAT off," it whispers, "but what about this looming challenge over there?”

Instead of letting doubt paralyze you, try reframing it. When I transitioned from writing snippets for nonprofits to crafting entire stories and essays, I didn’t automatically feel "ready." But instead of convincing myself I wasn’t good enough, I treated each new writing hurdle like an experiment. Could I stretch my skills? Could I explore untested ideas? Step away from doubt and into curiosity. After all, no one expects you to blindly know everything up front. You’re allowed to grow as you go.

Closing Thoughts: You Are Not Your Inner Critic

Here’s one last secret to overcoming impostor syndrome: It's not about vanquishing the doubt entirely. That voice might always pop up from time to time (mine definitely does!). The key is realizing it’s just a voice—not a truth, and certainly not a prophecy. You define your own path by continuing to show up and show out.

So next time impostor syndrome sneaks in, remember: You’re the person you’ve been waiting for. No one’s going to show up and hand out an “official adult” badge or declare you finally, irrevocably ready. In love, in work, or out on the metaphorical waves, trust yourself enough to paddle out. Even if you wipe out a few times, hey—it’s all part of the ride.