Does anyone else have a running inventory of their “can’t-live-without” list stored in their brain like it’s the world's most niche survival kit? No? Just me? Maybe it’s a holdover from growing up beside the Pacific Ocean, where packing for the day required sunscreen, a towel, snacks, and the ability to MacGyver your way around a tide pool with nothing but a stick and determination. Over the years, that list has evolved beyond what I’d toss in a beach bag (although, spoiler alert, one or two tide-pool-inspired staples still make the cut). This little inventory feels like a love letter to life’s essentials—the items that make me feel at home wherever I am, whether it’s a first date or a solo afternoon chasing new waves of inspiration.
Let’s dive in (because, well, ocean metaphors run deep around here) and uncover the things I truly can’t live without.
1. My Worn-In Salt-Stained Tote
Some handbags are polished, leather, and worthy of Instagram OOTDs. Mine? It’s essentially a coastal pack mule. It’s the canvas tote I “borrowed” from my mom during my UC San Diego days, and it’s been through more adventures than most reality TV stars.
This tote is part bag, part personality test: reach inside, and you’ll find reusable utensils (because sustainability), a book with wavy pages from being abandoned mid-surf check, and a rotation of snacks ranging from granola bars to a sneaky bar of sea salt chocolate. It carries everything I need to seize the day—or to bribe a hiking buddy when we’re out of energy halfway to the summit. Plus, it weirdly works as a conversation starter. “Is that a smashed packet of soy sauce in there?” Why, yes. Yes, it is.
Why it matters: No matter how chaotic the day gets, this tote is my portable home base. It reminds me that preparedness can be as chic as it is practical—and that life is always better when you pack snacks.
2. A Journal That’s Seen My Ugly Cry Face
I know what you’re thinking: a writer with a journal. Groundbreaking. But I mean it—this isn’t your curated-for-aesthetic Bullet Journal. It’s the journal that holds my deepest, most unfiltered rants. If you flip through it, you’re as likely to find sketches of starfish as you are tangled thoughts on “what he meant when he said, ‘I’m just going with the flow.’” Spoiler: nothing good.
Journaling has been my saving grace, especially when navigating the emotional waves of relationships. There’s something about pouring your mess onto paper that makes it a little less messy. Bonus: You don’t have to Venmo your journal $125 an hour to listen to you spiral about your ex who still likes your Instagram posts.
Why it matters: Writing things down doesn’t just clear my head—it gives me the clarity to focus on what truly matters. Like reminding myself that I deserve better than vague surfer dude energy.
3. The Ocean (Or Any Body of Water, Really)
Look, I tried to come up with a quirkier contender for this spot, but the truth is, water is nonnegotiable for me. Whether it’s paddling out on my surfboard, exploring tide pools, or just sitting on the sand watching the horizon stretch beyond the imaginable, the ocean offers me a kind of therapy no pop psychologist could decode.
I’ve made some of my biggest life decisions while staring at the waves (are you picking up on a theme here?). Relationships that weren’t right for me? Broken down into manageable waves of emotion as I waited for the perfect set. Creative roadblocks? Dismantled one deep breath at a time while splashing around like an otter.
Why it matters: Water cleanses everything—your mind, your soul, and, let’s be honest, your dead skin if you’ve got a good salt scrub handy. Plus, it’s the ultimate reminder: life ebbs and flows, but it’s always moving forward.
4. The Playlist That Always Gets Me Through
If I had a dollar for every time I’ve felt the pull to create a hyper-specific Spotify playlist based on a fleeting emotion or slightly dramatic life event, I’d own beachfront property by now. My essentials soundtrack includes everything from Jack Johnson (mandatory coastal vibes) to Maggie Rogers (crying on your commute songs) to that one local surf band that never made it big but should have.
And yes, it’s color-coded by vibe because I’m both wildly chill and hopelessly Type A.
Music has this strange power to rearrange my emotional furniture. You know how the right song at the wrong time can make you sob embarrassingly in public? Yeah, it’s like that, but usually in private—and always cathartic.
Why it matters: Love letters fade, texts get left on read, but a perfectly curated playlist? That sticks with you. Just like a good date, it makes you feel seen.
5. An “I Can Do This” Meal—Avocado Toast, but Better
A recipe isn’t supposed to feel like a power pose, but mine might as well come with a superhero cape. It’s embarrassingly simple: whole grain toast (crunchy enough to make you work for it) topped with avocado, a sprinkle of flaky sea salt, lemon zest, and—a San Diego twist—a few dabs of your favorite hot sauce. Bonus points for a fried egg.
This toast has been there for me through everything: early-morning writing sessions, post-breakup existential crises, and pre-date jitters when I needed to nourish my body more than I needed to obsess over what I was wearing.
Why it matters: It’s proof that sometimes, the simplest things are what keep you grounded. (And full, which is equally important.)
6. A Wetsuit That Fits Like a Hug
I don’t care that a wetsuit isn’t the sexiest wardrobe item unless you’re actually a Marvel superhero pulling off a latex situation. My wetsuit is like armor. It’s what separates me from the cold waters of the Pacific—and also the cold reality that I really don’t like dating bros who don’t text back. (Fine, Jake. Go surf without me.)
This suit is my reminder to show up for myself—and for whatever lies on the other side of the waves. When I zip it up, I’m instantly braver, stronger, and less likely to care what anyone thinks about my saltwater hair or permanently sandy car.
Why it matters: Gear up for life, and the world feels infinitely more conquerable. Plus, “wetsuit confidence” should totally be a thing alongside “winged eyeliner confidence.”
7. Handwritten Notes from My People
Hidden in my bedside drawer is a collection of scraps—letters from my parents, post-it notes from friends, even a napkin doodle from a first date that involved too many margaritas and not enough decision-making about tacos. These notes remind me that connection is messy and flawed and beautiful. It doesn’t need to be polished. It just needs to be real.
In this age of emojis and texts that disappear faster than your last situationship, these notes feel timeless. They’re my emotional armor on days when life feels too loud or loneliness creeps in at the edges.
Why it matters: Love, in any form, leaves a mark. These notes remind me how lucky I am to carry those marks.
Conclusion: Surfing Life’s Essentials
Here’s the thing about figuring out what you can’t live without—it shifts, like the tides we’re all trying to navigate. Today’s tote bag might be swapped for tomorrow’s backpack. Avocado toast might give way to whatever pasta comfort food phase I rediscover next month. But the essentials? They all speak to something deeper: connection, clarity, and the ability to ride life’s waves (even the messy ones) with a little grace, humor, and maybe some hot sauce.
