Have you ever had one of those moments when life gifts you an unexpected teacher, someone who appears out of nowhere, delivers wisdom wrapped in ordinary conversation, and then vanishes like a 90s rom-com side character? This happened to me on a steaming hot afternoon in Madrid, when I was convinced the universe had hit the "shuffle" button on my carefully curated playlist of life lessons.
The Stranger in the Station
That summer in Madrid was the kind of hot that curls the edges of paperback books and makes you reconsider all your choices, including wearing denim. I was at Atocha train station, gripping a cup of iced coffee so tightly it might have contributed to climate change. I’d just missed my train—a crucial one for getting to a friend’s engagement party. My mood? Somewhere between “rage-texting” and “crying in the bathroom.”
Enter the stranger. She sat next to me on the wooden bench, and I noticed her because, unlike everyone else looking half-melted, she seemed serene. Think Meryl Streep in The Devil Wears Prada, but with the energy of someone who’d spent years meditating. Desperation being an excellent conversation starter, I blurted out my predicament. Her response? A warm laugh that somehow cooled the entire station.
“Let me guess,” she said in lilting Spanish, “you think this is a disaster.”
Catastrophes and Coconut Cake
Of course it felt like a disaster. Missing trains is a metaphor for failing at life, right? But this woman, whose name I never got, leaned in conspiratorially and said: “Here’s the thing—sometimes missing the train is exactly what you’re supposed to do.”
To drive her point home, she launched into a story about a time she refused to panic when life threw off her plans: a missed dinner date leading to a spontaneous trip through Lisbon instead. “And while I didn’t get the romance I was hoping for,” she added with a wink, “I found something better: the best coconut cake I’ve ever tasted.”
It was absurd and oddly comforting. Her calm confidence had a magnetic pull, like she knew something the rest of us hadn’t figured out yet: that there’s magic in unpredictability.
Missing Trains, Gaining Perspective
Our encounter lasted maybe fifteen minutes, but I’m fairly certain she changed my life. Before we parted ways, she passed on her golden advice about navigating moments of chaos:
- Zoom Out on Your Perspective. “When you’re in the moment, everything feels urgent,” she’d said. “But zoom out for a second. Will this matter in a week? A month? A year?” (Spoiler alert: It didn’t.)
- Let Go of Linear Thinking. Who decided “success” means moving forward without sidesteps? Sometimes a detour—whether it’s a missed train or a changed relationship status—is destiny in disguise.
- Find the Coconut Cake. Not always literal (although, admittedly, dessert helps), but even in a “lost” moment, there’s often something delightful if you look for it. A song on the radio, a conversation, or just the chance to enjoy being alive.
Making Peace with Detours in Love
Later that evening— after catching a later train and making it to my friend’s party with a story up my sleeve and slightly damp clothes—I thought about how timely this advice was. Lately, detours had been haunting me like plot twists in a telenovela, especially in love. Old flames that flickered out. Promising relationships that didn’t quite stick.
It hit me then: The universe doesn’t deliver experiences in a straight line, especially not in matters of the heart. New connections often spring from derailments we never saw coming. A funny conversation at a bar because you went out despite feeling “meh.” A reunion with an old crush because coincidentally, you both missed your train and are now stuck in the same city.
Oddly enough, this gave me hope. Just like at the train station, sometimes you have to sit back, take a deep breath, and trust that things are reshuffling for reasons that will eventually make sense—even if it feels as nonsensical as pineapple on pizza.
My Stranger, Your Lesson
The stranger at Atocha gave me a template for dealing with life’s—and love’s—inevitable curveballs. Sure, missed trains and mismatched relationships come with frustration, but they aren’t flaws in the system. They’re steps in the process. Maybe even the good steps.
So whether it’s a failed first date, an awkward silence, or yes, even a missed train, remember there’s likely wisdom waiting somewhere in the detour. And if you’re lucky? Maybe even some coconut cake.
